Exciting Ocean Tales

I bought a plunger, and I was all ready to plunge the sink just like they do on the telly, but then I hit a snag: I don’t actually know how to use one.

Here I was, all inspired by Escape to the Ocean, a spin-off from Escape to the Country. Instead of being chased by a ninja death squadron, this one sees a family suddenly forced from their nice suburban existence and onto the high seas, where they have to navigate the various foibles of owning a houseboat while also fending off attacks from pirates. Real 18th-century pirates, somehow, but also the other modern variety.

Back to plungers, this week’s episode had Emma lamenting how the drain camera inspection services available in Melbourne could no longer help them since they were hundreds of miles out at sea. They were having some troubles with their new boat toilet, you see, and all they had was a plunger. Usually all you need, but sometimes you need drainage contractors to help you out with the really serious issues. And none of those out in international waters, so you just have to make do until you can get back to Melbourne and find a friendly drain contractor to get the work done.

You’d think there wouldn’t be as many issues out at sea, but you’d be wrong! And the family can’t come back to Melbourne because Green-Beard the Eviscerator is waiting with his bloodthirsty crew in the Pass of Cthulhu, the only way back. So I guess the next episode will be Emma still trying to unblock the drain, thinking about how easy it would be if she could just call a Melbourne drain unblocking specialist.  Meanwhile, the twins Cassie and Leroy fend off an attack from a boat full of machine-gun-wielding mercenaries, while Gerald keeps the secret from them that they only have a week of rations left.

I love spin-offs!