The Ailing Bathroom

Budgets, and How They Drained My Soul: The Tale of Gregory.

That’s going to be the title of my autobiography, and no one will read it, and I’ll have to pay back the publishing company after they make a huge loss, and then I’ll have to tighten the budget… AGAIN.

Yeah, okay, I’m a compulsive spender; that certainly doesn’t help. I saw that tickets to see the Liquid Scorpions at the Marvel Stadium were on sale for early birds, and I thought, “Hey, I’m saving money!” instead of the far more important, “Hey, do I even have the money for this?”

I guess contacting a bathroom designer is going on the back-burner again. It’s been my passion project for a while, and every time I go in there (which is several times a day, funnily enough) I think how nice it would be to get it looked at by a bathroom renovation specialist. But then I check my bank account and find that I already used up my renovation savings for the month on a parrot called ‘Arvo Pärt II: Electric Boogaloo’ because some guy was selling him in the street, saying that he sang like an opera star. My mind was filled with thoughts of this parrot making me rich on some kind of tour, and now I just own a really expensive parrot who swears at me exclusively in French. And never sings.

No renovations for that month! None for this month either, because now I’ve got some really good seats to see the Liquid Scorpions on their Australasia Tour. I’ll have to make do with screwing the taps back on and gluing back in those bits of tiles falling off the bathroom wall. I’ll bear with my shower that has a water pressure lower than a stiff breeze, and hate myself just a little bit more.

I know where you can get cheap kitchen renovations. Melbourne locals may be interested to know this, and it may translate to bathrooms as well. It’s usually a bad thing, because I’m incapable of making budget-savvy decisions, but here I think it helps. Renovations that last is the goal.

-Gregory